I've been hearing that Oprah is getting ready to do a show on "wombs for rent" with a focus on IF treatments abroad. This absolutely infuriates me. I can't even begin to describe the anger that flows through me at hearing this. It's as if women who work so hard to have children simply aren't as sophisticated as those women who choose not to have children. Why don't we understand that we have been given such incredible freedom to be strong, independent women by not having children? Why aren't we more evolved?
There's always a line in feminism where if it's crossed the philosophy is no longer a tool for empowerment but rather an instrument of destruction. This is a perfect example of destructive feminism.
If we had cancer and were going abroad for treatment the tone of this topic would be "these poor women who've been forced by our health care system to seek treatment outside of the US for the chance of survival". Instead it's - "these pathetic desperate women who will stop at nothing to fulfill their insane desire to be mothers".
I removed Oprah from my TIVO list last week after watching the pathetic interview she did with Michael Moore (no political flames, please....) so I can't even delete her from my list in defiance of this latest attempt at "journalism".
My hope is that she does treat this topic fairly - though I have little faith she will actually do that. Maybe - one day - we can stop judging each other for the decisions we make and simply empathise with our sisters - and find the tie that binds us together and celebrate that rather than participate in destructive fodder that weakens the souls of other women.
Monday, October 8, 2007
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4 comments:
Well said! I suspect it will be "silly infertiles" kind of piece, but perhaps she will surprise us.
I do hope that Oprah does the topic justice. The women who are using surrogates in India, and those who are acting as surrogates in India, are all doing what they need to do. Seems like a positive, symbiotic relationship to me - everyone gets what they need. More power to 'em. And everyone else shouldn't judge.
I missed the first 30 minutes of today's show, so didn't get the full impact of the Indian surrogates apart from the one couple who'd been able to renovate a house with a working kitchen - as opposed to the one room shack they'd been living in before. They showed a picture of themselves and their two boys, all smiling, outside the place, I think.
Anyway, Oprah annoyed me (some more) when Alexis Stewart said she went to the bank to get her sperm, at which point the big O didn't - quite - roll her eyes. However, she made it clear she thought Alexis was nuts.
I dunno, I wish I'd seen the first half, because honestly? What I was thinking was that while there are bound to be abuses, maybe those surrogates are getting more out of the deal than we think...we get a baby, they get a boost up financially, and if you've never been poor, well, I can't begin to tell you how much of a difference a little money can make.
I'm so glad to hear somebody else who is getting concerned about where feminism falls into the mix of infertility. I've put myself out there as a feminist...why do I feel like it's slapping me in the face as I bumble my way through infertility?
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