Our Trip is Just Around the Corner!

I haven't posted much lately because I am trying really hard not to think about what we are doing. That sounds a bit crazy doesn't it? It's actually been hard to sit down and really plan this trip because work and life has been so very busy, for which I am grateful.

But - alas - I do have to think about this. I started my estrogen yesterday - 3 pills a day. We leave December 5. We are going to spend a few days in Prague before heading to Zlin for my first ultrasound on Decemer 10. Hubby spends time in the happy room for his deposit on the 11th and we will drive that afternoon to Cesky Krumlov and spend a day or so there. I am hoping desperately for Day 5 transfer so that would be on December 16.

My emotions around this trip are so confused. One minute I feel optimistic and another I feel like I have made a terrbile decision. I still feel pretty removed from this process - as if it hasn't actually sunk in that I will be going through that two week hell again and will either be pregnant or not pregant once again around Christmas. I'm focused on our vacation rather than the true purpose of the trip.

I've received several e-mails asking who we are using and what our experience has been. We ultimately chose to use ivfvacation.com. Marcela Fite has been very helpful. I can say it's really ben great working with her. I don't want to share any more than that until we've been to the clinic and met Dr. Anna. I will say the one significant draw-back for us has been the fact that I have no direct communication with the clinic or the doctor. Everything is filtered through a thrid party and I really don't like that.

I am praying for my donor, though. Praying that she knows the gift she is offering us and that the time on the meds will not be too difficult. I so wish I knew more about our donor. Her reasons for doing this, her personality, etc. I think that would help me feel more connected to the process but maybe not. It could do just the opposite. Regardless, I am grateful to this young woman and pray that she will be blessed.

Finally Feels Real!

So, today I feel it's truly official. I know I've said that several times but today really is the beinning of this new cycle. I did my Lupron shot tonight. I've really been dreading this - not because of the actual shot - I'm a pro with injecting myself at this point - but because I just hate Lupron. I hate the way I feel on this medicine and unfortunately, this isn't a micro-dose it's the full month shot. I went throguh 6 months of Lupron hell and it's a true miracle I survived - my poor husband was miserable.



At any rate - shot's done and now I'm planning our trip. Flight and hotel are booked. I actually getting excited. I'm doing my best to focus on the vacation aspect and not even really think about the IVF part - which, surprisingly, is easier than I would have imagined.